Self-Worth Archives - Breakthrough Savvy with Trilby Johnson

What does a mirror do? It mirrors or reflects objects or a scene back. It simply throws up a reflection of whatever happens to be situated just in front of it. It is a snapshot of an specific area. It does not contain information about the time or place or context of anything that is going on outside of this perimeter.

The mirror is impartial in what is reflected back. It is only when meaning is assigned to what is reflected back, that we begin to find out who is the fairest of us all. And then again, who is the judge of what is fair or not? Well, if you happen to be looking into the mirror, that would be YOU.

So my question then is, what exactly is being seen and reflected back? Well, everyone will see something different, determined by their focus, attitude and current mood or situation. For example, one day you can look at yourself and feel good with what is reflected back at you and another day, although you may have exactly the same clothes on, you may not feel so good about what is reflected back. So what makes the difference between one day and another?

Well, quite simply – attitude or perspective. Because we believe that what is being reflected back to us is the reality, we forget that this reflection is actually just an inverted mirage being held up in front of us. It is our interpretation of “the facts” that will determine the fairness of it all, so to speak. In other words, our definition.

The information is not in what the mirror is actually reflecting back to us, but rather our interpretation of it. The meaning that we attach to what we see, how we feel about it, which is influenced by time and space and what we are looking to see. Remember, people tend to see and hear what they want to see and hear. This is because the brain works by matching up items. If you have been feeling ill or tired, the tendency is to search for matching criteria that will support this state. This is all well and good, yet to create change or redefine, there is an important step here, that must not be overlooked. The step of choice!

Let us look at the fairy tale Snow White from which this saying originates. The story unravels to reveal that whilst on the outside the Queen appeared beautiful, on the inside she was vain and suffered from feelings of inferiority and lack. So, what is reflected on the surface, is not necessarily the whole story and is very subjectively relative and relatively subjective.

In my own personal awakening, this metaphor about the mirror being a reflection of myself, has taken quite a bit of reflection. No pun intended! 🙂 A common “New Age” explanation given is that we can only see in another, that which we are. That’s fine, however, where the danger lies is when there is a judgement attached to this. It is the judgement about whether this is good or bad, right or wrong that locks in the energy that will call forth matches.

The instant we classify or label something, we actually own it and then this is what will show up. Until we re-assess. Well, if you are like me, I didn’t get this awareness about re-assessing until lately. If our default definition is faulty, then we need to redefine the definition. Download the latest upgrade! And who determines the validity of this upgrade?

Recently, I have found myself contemplating the role that creation plays in this. As a creator, am I limiting myself with labels and definitions and how up to date are they anyway? What if the message of the mirror was an invitation to expand beyond the current definition of what I see, feel, think and be and create my own brand new world?

Since I have moved into this new awareness, guess what? The mirror on the wall is giving me a more expanded and fairer view. Yes, a mirror does reflect facts back to us, however, our interpretation of what the facts actually mean, is in our own hands.

Now that’s the fairest I’ve heard in the land ………….

In Light and Appreciation.

Trilby

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Trilby Johnson is a Breakthrough Metaphysical Intuitive Mentor offering realistic, practical principles to assist highly-sensitive, intuitive and conscious individuals to heal, thrive and live their desired BIG lives.

Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

No one likes to think of themselves as a complainer, right? I know I didn’t think of myself in this way and yet…

I noticed a few months back that I was feeling very grumpy and I was complaining more than usual. This in itself was fine, up to a point and initially felt good! And then I realized I was sliding into a repetitive rut and that complaining was stealing my enjoyment and ease in life.

How did I become aware of this? Well, my mood mostly, and then I started to tune in to my inner self-talk. Always the best way to gauge where I really am. Negative and defeatest self-talk never leads to success if left unadressed and it feels lousy, to say the least. So I addressed it! Firmly and lovingly – with awareness and humour… and shifted to ways to feel grateful instead. Almost immediately, my mood and self-talk became kinder and felt much better.

To be honest, even optimistic and strong people can be vulnerable to complaining. As humans, our emotional make-up is extremely complex and layered. It’s not about getting it all right and never complaining and more about being aware and knowing thyself well. From my experience, there are always signals that begin to show up as indicators of the direction I’m travelling. This is what Carl Jung, the Swiss Psychiatrist coined as ‘shadow work’ required to make the unconscious conscious.

The instances that helped me realize what was actually going on, was when I seemed to come across lots of posts on social media, people complaining! What the heck?! Yup, this is how it can show up and if I wasn’t aware and clear on where I want my emotional and mental compass to be, then I could get sucked in.

I can clearly remember my sense of affrontment when many years ago my therapist made me aware of the part of me that was the complainer. What, me a complainer!! No WAY… Yes, indeed WAY! When I was able to see and acknowledge that a part of me felt comfortable complaining, I was able to make an empowered and conscious choice about this behaviour and pattern. I’m always grateful for clarity about myself!

Now, complaining is quite a common although disavowed habit, that can negatively impact our emotional well-being, relationships, and even physical health. As a complainer, we don’t always realize that what we are doing is ‘complaining’ and the impact this is having, until we become aware or have someone else point it out to us. This is NOT about judging yourself or others… it’s about awareness, perception and empowerment.

Complaining can also be a psychological defensive mechanism that occurs when we feel powerless to change something and creates a feeling of ambivalence. Beneath this mindset and behavioural pattern lies a wealth of wisdom about yourself, if your willing to dig and be honest with yourself.

To help make the unconscious more conscious, here are some ways that complaining can have a limiting impact longer-term:

1. Mental Health:

Complaining can lead to lowered mood and symptoms of anxiety, depression, and a negative outlook on life. This makes it harder to cope with stress and life’s challenges.

2. Personal Growth:

Continual complaining can hinder personal growth, causing feelings of irritability, frustration, and misplaced anger. This can show up as physical symptoms such as headaches, stomach pains, and a loss of appetite – ways that our body is letting us know that something needs to be addressed, not medicated, as is often the case. Don’t avoid seeking medical attention however to bring peace of mind.

3. Personal Relationships:

Most people don’t like hanging out with someone who is constantly complaining. Complaining behaviour can result in isolation and frustration in others, leading to feelings of loneliness and social isolation.

4. Lack Mentality:

Complaining robs people of enjoyment and is a sign of a sense of lack mentality. There’s often a belief of unworthiness that can lead to financial worries and psychological distress.

5. Negative Behaviors and Habits:

Complaining can reinforce negative thinking patterns further and prevent individuals from taking action to address their concerns. No one likes to think of themselves as a complainer and this shuts us off from our awareness to when we do complain, making change seem impossible.

I’ve mentioned above how I shifted my mood and want to include some alternatives that can help break free from the cycle of complaining:

1. Gratitude Attitude:

Shift your focus from negative to positive aspects of life by practicing gratitude. Find anything that you can feel grateful for… and there’s always at least one thing, in the Present moment! (Read my blog 4 Breakthrough Steps to Gratitude for deeper insights)

2. Healthy Expression:

All emotions are messengers and we honour them, yes even the ‘bad’ one when we acknowledge them. We learn to manage our emotions by venting negative emotions and honouring how we truly feel. Talking about how you feel in a safe and present way is healthy and not complaining.

3. Understand that there is a Cost:

Be willing to recognize the link between complaining and the negative impact on mental, emotional, and physical health. If you need a mentor to help you see the bigger picture, take action. I certainly wouldn’t have the abilities I do today on my own, without the mentoring I received.

4. Focus on What You Can Control:

Stop complaining about things you can’t change and take action to address concerns within your control. Complaining steals your power, that’s all!

5. Set Your Intention:

Challenge yourself to go without complaining for a set period of time. Start small, e.g. one hour at a time. Initially, simply begin to notice where you complain and how you feel in the moment.

If you notice yourself complaining, stop and breathe. No judgement. Take back your power by identifying the triggers that lead to complaining and reflect on your emotions, identify the source, notice patterns, ask for feedback, and be present to your words, thoughs, behaviours. By understanding the impact of complaining and taking conscious action to break the habit, you can improve your emotional well-being and overall quality of life.

Will you stop complaining 100%. Maybe… However, if and when you do find yourself complaining – cause you’re Human right – then you will have the knowledge and skills to manage this behaviour efficiently, in a way that empowers you and sets you free from feeling like a victim.

Don’t let complaining steal your happiness!

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Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!

©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

Where do you live and under what conditions? Since the age of 17 I have moved 25 times. I haven’t counted the times I moved prior to 17, but it was a lot. I don’t mind and I guess in some way this nurtured my love for travel. I have also had four major country moves in my life and I look forward to more. One thing I have learned from all this moving around though is that wherever I go, I take myself with me. Despite being in new surroundings after some time, the same old patterns would begin to emerge. Have you had this happen to you?

I am sharing this, because most people think of their home as the physical address where they live. There is a place that you live first and foremost though. Your body! Your first and permanent home, whilst you are alive, is your body. Whilst people take tremendous care of their physical houses and places of residence, most have very little knowledge of their true home – their body. This is the reason that so many give away their power to health professionals who supposedly know more about their home than they do. And this is partially true because we have been led away from our true homes. Everything is within and your access route is via your body.

So as your body is the place that you really live in and with for your whole life, what kind of a home do you want to experience and have? The conditions that you live in and under – with regards to your body – are extremely important as they will impact directly on the quality of your life’s experience. What if you had a home that is comfortable, that suits you, that supports you, where you can relax, where there is no judgement, where you can truly be you 24/7, where you can connect to health, abundance, love, joy and to your Self, etc.!

Over my 30 years as a Metaphysical Intuitive and Healer, I’ve seen how disconnected so many are from their bodies. As long as you are disconnected and not fully present in and with your body, you will not experience being home. Most people are not even aware that they are in a space of disconnect because our brains have be wired to overlook this information, particularly in this very mental focused world. The mental will always keep you in the mental. Whereas your body will bring you information from your body-mind-soul. This is the reason that becoming aware of whether, where and how we are connected is, I feel, imperative to us finally experiencing the lives we say we desire. This is the Vision I hold because it has been my life’s experience.

For many years I looked outside of myself for a sense of being home and it was only when I started to love and honour my body exactly as it was that my sense of confidence, love and joy expanded. It was then that I began to get an inkling of the immense wisdom that was hidden and that came through my physical sensations, hunches and feelings. Our bodies capture the language of the Universe – Energy – and are constantly communicating it to us.

Up until now, many of us however have ignored these signals because we have been given misguided information, if any at all. To truly experience living orgasmically – that sense of total and unlimited and beyond time sensual connection to all that is – we have to overcome first the fear – yes fear – of our bodies and then we have to learn to open up to the language of our body-mind-soul connection, which is all channeled via our physical body and aura.

Before we can love our body, we have to establish a connection and if there is a connection already, be willing to explore it further. True intimacy begins within each of us and it is only through a sense of self-trust that a reliable and confident connection comes about. As well as through trial and error. So don’t beat yourself up over it. When you learned to walk, you did it one step at a time.

Also a healthy connection will flourish and become better integrated in a kind and loving environment. And it starts with you choosing these vibrations and then allowing whatever that is not or is to show up and be experienced so that it can be set free. Energy simply wants to move and it is our personalities that lock energy into our bodies through our choices of thoughts, feelings and emotions.

I feel now more than ever, we’re now at a time in evolution where shifting through and out of this is possible. The place to start, is at home. That means you and your body – the connection to your reality.

In Light and Appreciation
Trilby

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Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!

It’s been said many times that the only constant in Life is change. Yet people cling to the same old same so desperately in a vain attempt to slow things down, or to stop this inevitable unfolding.

I use the term “change” here in the sense of growth and expansion and as a natural movement of Life and Living. Not in the sense that something is wrong and needs fixing.

When one truly embraces change as a daily constant, there is a fluidity and transparency that begins to appear, at first in bursts and spurts, and then increases in amplitude. However, before this may show up, everything one seems familiar with or takes at face value can begin to crumble. Everything that one may have held as steadfast and that is false and related to one’s sense of identity is challenged and requires letting go of.

Paradoxically, as these layers of acquired identity begin to unravel, one may find one’s self experiencing a sense of profound confusion, disorientation, loss, sadness, grief, interspersed with moments of intense ecstacy. This turbulent period can seem endless and has often been referred to as the ‘dark night of the Soul’, whereas what if it is more of a death of the Ego?

This is the moment when the Soul begins to shake off the shackles of lifetime’s of conditioning, persecution and torture. And the Ego stamps and screams, imploring one to get things back together because everything is “falling apart or to pieces (peaces)”. This is the lie that the Ego-Self uses to get us to cling so desperately at straws. Needless to say, it is very dramatic and seems very real and urgent.

Yet the more time passes and the facade falls away, a strange thing begins to happen. Perhaps fleetingly at first, one begins to feel bored by all the drama and trauma. For many this will result in extra bursts of activity as the attempt is made to fill the void. Until one just ends up feeling more exhausted and facing a yawning and seemingly empty pit. Some resist falling into oblivion by creating dis-ease, depression, bankruptcy, addictions, relationship or money issues. This only perpetuates the drama a while longer, but the Soul is unrelenting in it’s purpose. And what may seem as if one’s life is falling apart, is actually a “fall-in2 peaces”!

Warning – there is no drama or trauma to peace.

There is nothing to push against or fight for. At first it may seem boring, as all the usual external stimuli no longer have their previous pull of attraction. What was previously thought to be the void, is a growing sense of detachment that has been establishing itself firmly in the seat of Consciousness. Having fallen into peace can seem strangely unsettling and uncomfortable at first, which may be unexpected in association with peace. The state of being in and at Peace is a new experience for so many of us. The common notion of peace has very little to do with this majestic experience of peaceful Be-ing.

The actual experience of peace is beyond the awareness of the masses at the moment, until we all fall-in2 peaces.

In Light
Trilby

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Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.

In my role as a Breakthrough Mentor and Metaphysical Intuitive, I often come up against the many ways in which I and others continue to limit ourselves in connection with our values. The polarity of what is or is not valuable!

Throughout our lives, we strive to uphold our values and the beliefs that stem from these. Yet how many of us are truly aware of these values and what they actually mean and the ways in which they both free and limit us? Ask a few people what their values are and what these values actually represent to and for them and you open up a real can of worms.

Values like respect, love, faith, hate, safety, time, money, etc are the backbone of so much of what we do and choose and yet how many of these values are truly of our own choosing and are they still valid for us today?

Here, I particularly want to look at the value of VALUE.

How do you value yourself?

Do the ways in which you value yourself add to you and your life?

Do the ways is which you value yourself actually limit you?

When you choose something, or not, does your value system, value YOU?

This comes up often, when for example a person turns down a Reiki class for reasons of time and money.

How to argue against these two staunch and valid value systems?

I used to go into the justification of the why and how and when, only to stop myself.

I realized that’s about a value system and a feeling of worth.

Where are all the places we use time and money as reasons for not valueing ourselves?

And I chose to hold the value that where there is a will there is a way. I found it felt correct to say that I always have the time and money, however, sometimes I choose to spend it on something else.

This is an important distinction in my opinion and balances the underlying directive energy that sets the tone and vibration of allowing and receiving.

What is the value of a class and learning a new modality?

Is it something that will add to your life and thus your contribution to others?

What if the information from the class has a ripple effect in your life, way above and beyond the time and money you spend?

What is the value of choosing to pay medical bills rather than learn a bodywork modality that increases body health and awareness? Not only for you, but others as well.

What value do you attach to change and is it something you truly desire?

What is the value of time and money? How have you made them more valuable than YOU?

I don’t know about you, but many times I have turned something down because the time and money were more valuable to me than ME. I was not choosing from a place of self-worth and valueing ME and then demanding that whatever was required to make it happen show up. What a crazy way to think!

If you’re a practitioner, where have you made the modalities you work with more valuable than leaning something new?

For me, there are no limitations in Oneness and yet within the practitioner field, I am often aware of an unwillingness to explore anything new. What is the value of finding the one modality that works for everything and everyone?

I have played with several modalities and use them all for myself and then my clients.

What’s valuable to me, is the value of how the modality expands and enhances everything in myself and my life.
Definitely worth the time and money, the investment in me – a gift that keeps on gifting…

As Neale Donald Walsch wrote, “your Life begins at the end of your comfort zones.” And what is the value of your comfort zones and holding on to them? How do they validate you?

What would your life look like if you choose every day in every way to value the Greatness of YOU, no matter what?

When you align daily with the value of you and what’s of value to you, then infinite possibilities appear…

And if you’re not sure what your values are and would like to release yourself from old values and not sure how, I can assist you in a Breakthrough 1:1 session. Just reach out….

In Light
Trilby

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Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!

Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.