by Breakthrough Savvy - Trilby Johnson | Abundance, Be Happy, Behaviour, Decision Making, Emotions, How to accept myself for who I am, Mental Health Awareness, Mindset, Self-Actualization, Self-Worth, Success, Take action, Well-Being, Words |
It’s possible to learn how to manage anger by understanding the energy dynamic of this emotion better and changing perspective so that there is a shift in consciousness.
Anger is usually considered an unsavoury and destructive type of emotion. In other words, unsavoury is a belief that only fuels its often volatile nature. When out of control, angry feelings can escalate into violence and destruction and so frightens us. Yet, anger is an emotion like any other. It is when this emotion is misdirected or impeded that it can build up into something explosive and be expressed in destructive ways.
Many people are uncomfortable and frightened by anger, in a large part due to how we are socialized. Today there are many anger management courses available, which can help teach people how to manage this emotion. When we attempt to stop an emotion for long enough, by suppressing or repressing it, it is like trying to stop a volcano from erupting – eventually, it will blow up.
1. Anger is primal
As I wrote in my blog Understanding Your Emotional Makeup about what an emotion is – anger is often considered one of the base emotions. So when we feel threatened or afraid, anger can often be an instinctive reaction in an attempt to safeguard ourselves.
This is often what happens when someone ‘snaps’ or ‘lashes out’. So it’s important to address our personal issues so that there are no pent up emotions that can potentially explode.
2. Anger is a secondary emotion
A secondary emotion occurs in response to something else happening first. Even those that apparently ‘fly off the handle’, there is something causing the anger. Now, this doesn’t mean it’s okay to go ballistic, be aggressive or hurt someone.
To get a handle on angry feelings, however, does require self-interrogation and perhaps some time to cool down, if necessary. The particularity about anger is that underneath this secondary feeling, is your personal power and ability to be discerning.
When you are in touch with these aspects, it makes you calmer and self-assured, less liable to allow yourself to be manipulated by others.
3. Anger can motivate you
Generally, anger arises when one of your personal values, self-worth or safety is challenged, jeopardized or disrespected. Can you remember a time when someone said something untrue about you? Did you feel angry? That angry feeling is a response to an untruth – a misalignment in the energy – and your barometer to let you know that you are not okay with what is going on. Anger can often empower you to say ‘NO’ and motivate you to take a stand and not let yourself be a doormat. When you are able to manage your anger appropriately, you have the ability to assert your rights in a way that leaves no room for doubt as to your sincerity.
4. Anger is not a sin
Often spiritual people can feel it’s wrong to be angry. As if one excludes the other. Whatever it is you want to call it doesn’t matter.
The point is to be whole and fulfilled, you are going to have to accept and allow all of yourself to be. And that means being alright with the whole spectrum of emotions. None are more important than another if you look at them as messages.
Every emotion is telling you something about yourself so that you can get to know yourself better. And in my opinion the sin lies in not embracing all of you.
5. Anger is contagious
By this I mean, that often families and social groups ‘share’ ideologies and these get passed on through education and indoctrination.
Firstly, is the anger yours? Have you asked the question? Until you ask the question you will not know. Often we are walking around with unconscious patterns playing out.
Research has shown that it is possible for us to pick up on other people’s energy and vice versa. If you know you are highly sensitive, an empath, or psychic, then asking this will save you energy and unnecessary stress. Give it a go and see if you notice a difference.
6. Transmute the anger
When you are in the grips of primal anger, the quickest way I have found to flick the switch so that you can stay discerning and express yourself appropriately is by focusing on your breathing. Stopping to take a few conscious breaths slows down the parasympathetic nervous system and so your brain stops sending fight or flight signals. I invite you to Destress, Detox, and Relax by getting your free download of my audio tool on conscious breathing.
7. Empower yourself through mentoring
If your struggling and stuck in patterns of angry behaviour, don’t hesitate to get support! It’s important to get practical skills that can help you shift your mood and fortunately today, it’s encouraged.
Often anger is a response to a feeling of hopelessness or lack of knowing how to manage something.
You are not at the mercy of your emotions and if you feel that you are, this is definitely a sign to find a mentor to help you in finding clarity and confidence. There’s always a solution and having an unbiased and professional support system is an important step in managing your angier in a healthier way.
As a species, humans have the ability to experience diverse emotions. Anger can be used as a powerful tool of discernment and also the potency to see things through. As with all emotions, it’s not only what we do when feeling them, it’s especially how we do it! When we take charge of managing and expressing our anger constructively, we will begin to find ourselves in a place where we can consider adding a dose of forgiveness.
It takes a conscious choice to manage anger in an empowering healthier way.
Trilby Johnson is a Breakthrough Metaphysical Intuitive Mentor offering realistic, practical principles to assist highly-sensitive, intuitive and conscious individuals to heal, thrive and live their desired BIG lives.
Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!
©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.
Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.
by Breakthrough Savvy - Trilby Johnson | Abundance, Authentic, Be Happy, Beliefs, Choice, Law of Attraction, Mindset, Spirituality, Success, Well-Being, Words |
There’s so much emphasis around ‘gratitude’ and how important it is if you want to be successful and fulfilled. So what happens when it seems a big ask to find something to be grateful for or about?
While being grateful is something we can all probably aspire to be more of, for many years I admit – I struggled to feel gratitude. It’s not that I didn’t want to be grateful – I did – however, keeping with my own integrity and honesty, I knew I wasn’t there yet! And quite frankly, faking it until I made it, wasn’t working for me either.
This often left me confused and feeling guilty – was there something wrong with me that I couldn’t feel gratitude for everything and all of the time? I was in a transformational pickle and for some time did not know which way to turn! Have you ever felt like this and wondered what’s going on or how to change it?
Quite simply, as the individual you are, the way in which you experience events and gratitude, is totally exclusive to you. So when presented with a new concept, it’s up to you to find the doorway in. Here are some of clues I followed that helped me to break through into gratitude, in a way that felt genuine and empowering.
1. Define Gratitude
Very often, due to indoctrination and socialization, you can get pulled into the definition of the ‘group consciousness’ around different concepts. Gratitude, is simply one example. So what does gratitude mean for you?
As humans, there is a tendency to want to classify information. For the most part, the linguistic or language meaning is used, as a form of creating easier understanding and cognitive cohesion. On the surface this works. However, this only addresses the mental aspects of definitions. There is another level of definition, commonly called semantics, or in other words, meaning. Take a look at what’s underneath the gratitude.
The way the brain stores data is very much linked to the emotional charge of the events in your life. When strong emotions are involved, then defining gratitude becomes a whole different kettle of fish. If you were to stop and imagine yourself being grateful, what would that look like, feel like, sound like to you? Follow these clues. I suggest one way of how, in point two.
2. Feel Your Way
Trust your feelings because they are your compass. If even feeling gratitude feels off, then all it is showing you, is that you haven’t yet found your way. Often there is a tendency to judge this as right or wrong, which can create a wedge between where you are and feeling gratitude. This is the reason that defining what gratitude embodies for you is essential, otherwise it simply will not stick and keeps you stuck.
If you feel that gratitude means giving up, faking it, lying to yourself, making another part of you feel wrong and it’s greedy to ask for more – then you will sabotage yourself in some way. It’s important to look at all the aspects that go into an attitude of gratitude – for you. And when along the way, it feels off for you, keep going and ask for clarity as you move forward. Feel your way – it’s your best bet!
3. Use Manners
Your words matter! They really do. Do you consciously say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ when you want or receive something? This may appear an ‘old fashioned’ way of doing things, however, I am a firm believer in ‘old wisdom’.
The way you are speaking to others, is an outward reflection of how you speak to yourself – it shows what kind of a mind-map you have. Everything is within and this includes the capacity to gift and receive – and the code words to access these states are ‘please’ and ‘thank you’.
As a child, I was taught that if I wanted something, to ask and say ‘please’. And when I received something, to say ‘thank you’. Only much later as an adult did I observe, that when I consciously applied these to my intentions and desires, there was a distinct shift in the energy dynamic. Almost as if the Universe stopped and paid attention to what I was going to say and do.
Using manners helps to cultivate a ‘walk the talk’ behaviour! When I use my manners, I am acknowledging the divine aspect within myself and my capacity to co-create with Life itself. I am honouring my Self. This allows more ease and joy and a feeling of being ‘great-full’.
4. Make your Life a Gratitude Journal
A very powerful and practical way to create the possibility of breaking through into gratitude in my experience, is with a gratitude journal. I found it really helpful to focus on writing down things I was grateful for. It helped me to count my blessings and give them form. However, please don’t let keeping a journal be the end result. It’s the starting point! Apply this ‘gratitude’ in your daily life and interactions and communications with others.
In my personal experience, to fully integrate a mindset, takes conscious direction and frequent implementation. This is about applying mental and often abstract concepts with focus daily to create a ‘habit of gratitude’. This helped me to move through the struggle and meet gratitude in a pragmatic and tangible way that worked for me. And so can you!
Remember, gratitude is a process and as such, you simply cannot force your way into it. By connecting to the essence of what gratitude feels like for you, then you will have your unique form of gratitude. You do this by systematically assessing your feelings and observing what comes up for you.
Adjust. Align. Choose.
As you move forward with each step you are feeling your way and breaking through into gratitude.
Many Blissings
Trilby x
Trilby Johnson is a Breakthrough Mentor and Metaphysical Intuitive, Best-Selling Author and Speaker. Clients hire her to stop struggling and move beyond limitation. Trilby assists in creating the new energetic pathways that empowers and assists in resolving core issues.
Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Assessment if you are ready for breakthrough beyond limitation into wisdom!
©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.
Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.
by Breakthrough Savvy - Trilby Johnson | Abundance, Alternative Therapy, Author, Awareness, Be Happy, Behaviour, Beliefs, Books, Choice, Coaching, Decision Making, Emotions, Freedom, Happiness, How to accept myself for who I am, Inspiration, Joy, Law of Attraction, Life, Mindset, Personal Development, Self-Worth, Success, Take action, Uncategorized, Well-Being, Words |
Did you know that public speaking is one of the most frequent and strongest fears that people have? I used to be one of them and here is what I learned. My fears stemmed from memories of numerous failed and embarrassing class speeches that had gone horribly wrong. Additionally, I grew up believing that what I had to say was not interesting anyway. Plus, I hated confrontation and public speaking was the worst case scenario. Can you relate to any of this?
Consequently, for many years I would do everything I could to avoid public speaking in any form and this meant even avoiding speaking up for myself. For a long time, I denied my inner voice that was inviting me to challenge these beliefs and to stand up and speak out fearlessly!
Don’t get me wrong. I did find many creative and ‘safe’ ways of expressing myself. Unwittingly, they have helped me to build my confidence, hone my expertise and most importantly stand in my authority and explore what I am really good at and enjoy. The advent of social media, podcasts, tele-summits, blogging and self-publishing have all contributed greatly to my ‘coaching’.
A key to effective problem solving I have found – and one that addresses all aspects of an issue – is to never face a problem head on! This can create huge resistance and amplifies feelings of frustration and overwhelm and discouragement. For example, if you are driving from A to Z and on the way there is a major road block, you would look for alternative routes and ways to get there, right? Looking for alternatives and solutions is a great way to solve problems and allows other possibilities to show up, which you may not of thought of initially. So what this advent did for me, was that I was actually learning to stand up and speak out, without seeing it as public speaking! This helped removed the fear factor and look at things from a different perspective.
It’s taken many years to finally break through this pattern of fear and shift my mindset around public speaking. Funnily enough, I realized this fully when I recently gave a talk at my local library’s ‘Author’s Evening’ to introduce my book ‘FEARLESSLY ALONE‘ and talk about what had motivated me and why. Was I nervous? You bet! In fact, unusually so. Because this time I was presenting something that was important to me – it wasn’t like those classroom speeches where I spoke about someone else’s ideas – this was about issues that were close to my heart and I felt extremely vulnerable. Yet, I wanted to be able to stand up and speak out fearlessly, even if others were challenging me and didn’t agree. I wanted to present my ideas without being confrontational and yet inspire food for thought and challenge old concepts. And I did just that!
You see, I knew my material well. It was a part of me and my life experience. I was my resource library. To create the mindset I wanted, I looked at all the beliefs that surfaced and I shifted each and every one of them. I also created those I would need as a positive back up – confidence, self-worth, awareness, humour and being willing to be vulnerable. I was able to transmute the fear of judgement of others and the need to be wrong or right. I was there to express my interesting point of view, to offer food for thought and to create connection with those whom my information could support.
More importantly, all the previous online ‘training’ had been preparing me for this moment and as I took action, even feeling really nervous, I was able to connect to that place within where I know who I am and believe in myself. It was such a wonderful and empowering experience! So much so, that it has ignited a burning desire to stand up and speak out fearlessly more often. Who would have thought this was possible? Certainly not that shy and unhappy school girl from way back. It took me six years to manifest this evening and prepare myself mentally and emotionally and spiritually. It all began a long time ago, when my Heart’s Knowing whispered to me, “You can do it!”… and so can you!
Some steps you can take towards standing up and speaking out fearlessly are:
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Dare to believe in your dreams, no matter how silly or far away they may seem.
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Ask and be willing to receive.
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Take the baby steps and actions that come with ease to you.
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Change direction as required without losing sight of your destination.
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Build a mindset with beliefs that support your growth and that feel good along the way.
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Trust that any thing is possible and look for opportunities!
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Believe in yourself!
In Light and Appreciation
Trilby
Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.
Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!
©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.
Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.
by Breakthrough Savvy - Trilby Johnson | Abundance, Beauty, Behaviour, Body, Breathing, Choice, Freedom, Health, Inspiration, Intuitive, Joy, Love, Relationship, Self-Worth, Success, Thrive, Uncategorized, Value, Well-Being, Words |
Since 2014, low body-image is out. Self-acceptance is in! And if you are going to embrace being a natural Diva, self-acceptance is an essential ingredient. Every women is a diva, simply by her birthright. Think of it that way. You start at marvellous and work your way up from there, without arrogance or disdain. If you don’t feel that you are quite there yet, here are 7 affirmations for a positive body-image. Your body-image impacts on every single area of your life, so make it the best version you can. Remember, affirmations are not about forcing yourself to believe something that you don’t feel. That’s silly and a waste of your time and intelligence. Change begins with the first step and being willing. Ultimately, you are the only one who can change the relationship you have with your body!
1. I accept and love my body exactly as it is
Ah, if it were only so easy you may be thinking. Begin with baby steps. It’s taken centuries of social and cultural conditioning to lead you here. So be gently and kind and patient with yourself. Most of all though, be honest with yourself. Are you at least WILLING to begin to accept and love your body, as it is, here and now? When you can at least be willing, you allow something different a chance to show up. You release the rigid judgment you have on your current body-image.
2. I am grateful for my body
It’s no secret, that gratitude or appreciation, engenders a beauty of its own that transcends the mere physical. When you shower your body with gratitude rather than judgment, it will respond favourably in kind and very quickly. Start by acknowledging something that your body does for you everyday. For instance, the fact that your body knows how to breath for you, is a great and wonderful skill, that literally keeps you alive. Imagine if you had to remember to breathe every breath of each day. How exhausting would that be? Shift into a mindset of being grateful for everything your body does for you.
3. I claim and embrace my Diva Body
It’s very simple. You have to claim what you want. Especially if you don’t feel that you have it. If you are going around grouching about how awful you look, this is how you show up. This is not how a Diva behaves, is it? The one thing noticeable about a Diva is her confidence. And that comes from accepting all of herself, as she is, and being proud. Claim your Diva Body today.
4. I am the authority of my body
To feel good about yourself in the body you have, requires accountability. As long as you allow yourself to be influenced by external factors like the media, beauty industry and yes sadly other women’s opinions, when it comes to your body, you will most likely find yourself feeling terrible about your body. There is only one person who has the body you have and that is you. Celebrate it and even flaunt it. Why wouldn’t you? You possess one-of-a-kind!
5. I nurture a positive body-image
You body is like a car. No disrepect. What you put in it and how you treat it, is what you will get out. Your body reflects the quality of the nurturing you give it. Nurturing is not just about the food you eat and the exercise programme you follow. It is also very much the thoughts and emotions you have about yourself whilst you are busy doing all of these activities, throughout the day.
6. I have a sacred relationship with my body
Whether you acknowledge it or not, your body is your one true home and your most trustworthy friend. It is where everything you experience in your life occurs first. When you treat it with respect and sacredness, it will reward you tenfold in more ways than you can imagine.
7. When I feel connected to my body, I am never alone and I feel happy and alive
Negative body-image comes from thoughts and feelings that creates an energetic barrier within yourself and you cells. This leaves you feeling isolated. That’s how the body-image demon gets in. Don’t even give them a chance!
As with anything, the more you use these, write them down and say them out loud and connect to the positive feelings, the more and quicker the change can show up. Hope you find these useful in enjoying your experience of being a Diva with a positive body-image.
In Light and Appreciation.
Trilby Johnson
Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.
Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!
©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.
Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.
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by Breakthrough Savvy - Trilby Johnson | Abundance, Authentic, Author, Awareness, Behaviour, Body, Choice, Consciousness, Health, Inspiration, Relationship, Self-Worth, Success, Take action, Uncategorized, Value, Well-Being, Words |
You’ve probably heard about the X Factor but have you heard about the H Factors? This is not about the TV show and more about setting your own default value settings so that you will be the star in your own life. When it comes to living a successful life, I believe there are two H factors that you must add to your value system to have this – Happiness and Health!
The motivation behind much of what humans do, is to have these two things in life. All the running after success, love and money is basically linked to these two aspects of life. Ask people what they want most in life and ultimately when you drill right down, it’s about being happy and healthy. Yet for many, these two simple factors are rare or sporadic. Many spend their lives working hard to earn money and make ends meet, only to lose along the way, the very things they have been aiming for in the first place and long-term – their happiness and health. Suddenly, the future can look and feel really bleak.
My new book ‘Fearlessly Alone – Stop the Lonely Crisis and Find Your Happy’ takes an insightful and informative look at how happiness and health are imperative to living a fulfilled life and how to achieve them. It is important to add and prioritize these values in your life, to give yourself a fighting chance at peace, prosperity and a purposeful relationship with yourself and consequently others too.
Your values are a set of core principles that you use in making decision across your life based on importance and need. Not to be confused with your beliefs, which are basically assumptions that we take to be true. A conflict of values can arise when two important values come into play and you have to make an important life decision. For instance, whether to stay in a job you hate and find boring for security because you’ve been there for years, or to go for a new job where you can express your value of creativity and independence but there is less job and financial security.
Throughout your life, you strive to meet your values – like respect, love, faith, happiness, health, family, abundance, time, money, etc – and that are the backbone to so many of your choices. It’s important to ask questions when it comes to the ranking of your values, especially when having a conflict of values. Because there is a reason behind this and it may not always be what you think it is.
Prioritizing and updating your values is very important because you and the situations you find yourself in change. When I did this exercise a few years ago, imagine my astonishment when I saw that happiness and health were not even in the top 10. No wonder there seemed to be a lack around happiness and health. Actively participating in your values settings, helps to prioritize them in your subconscious mind and is boosted further when you set positive intentions. It’s about adding value to your life, when and how it serves you best.
Here is a short exercise to help you identify and update your top 10 core values are:
- Sit down and write down the first things that come to mind that are important to you in your life. (If you need examples of values, just google values and you can find lists to draw from.)
- Rank them from 1 to 10 with 1 being the most important and 10 the least.
- Then ask yourself if these are still valid for you?
- Are these values truly your own?
- When sorted, ask if there are any ‘new’ values that you wish to add? Add and rank them.
- Reflect on what has come up for you and also write down any of the beliefs that may have popped up. For example, your health depends on your genetic make-up; you can’t be happy because then people will think you are selfish.
- If happiness and health are not in your top 10, I invite you to add them in. Just for fun and because you can. Then sit back and watch what shows up.
When it comes to your personal values about happiness and health, the way you feel can offer up wonderful and powerful clues. Tune in to your body and sense where the feelings are physical sensations and what they feel like. For instance, do you feel heavy or light. Your body is the best barometer you will ever have when it comes to making the best life choices for you. Simply because, if something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t the best choice – for you, in the moment. Check in regularly as you are constantly changing with each choice you make. What makes you happy or feel healthy today, may not be the same in two weeks time.
The more you clarify your values and the beliefs you hold around happiness and health, the more confident you can be when making important life decisions. Your happiness and health and how you create and sustain them are so important to feeling confident and fulfilled in your life. Incorporating these H Factors into your decisions will put the You into Value! That’s what happened for me, once I did. And the same is possible for you too.
In Light and Appreciation
Trilby
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Trilby Johnson is an Emotional Breakthrough Mentor, Author and Speaker whose clients hire her to go from emotional zero to emotional hero, as they heal, alleviate stress and cultivate emotional freedom in their lives, relationships, finances, emotions, health and mindset. She shares her knowledge of how to create inner harmony and outer balance with those seeking to deepen their self-knowing and expand their consciousness.
Contact Trilby for a Breakthrough Alchemy Assessment if you are ready for go from zero to hero now!
©Trilby Johnson. All Rights Reserved. Copyright Prohibited. Please share any part of this article with reference to this original blog.
Disclaimer: Any information shared here is not a substitute or replacement of any medical, psychological, legal or financial advice.Save
It’s possible to learn how to manage anger by understanding the energy dynamic of this emotion better and changing perspective so that there is a shift in consciousness.